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Other entries in Ulaanbaatar

First curry of the trip, mmmmmmmmm

Not only was i pissed off to have to get up so early, but my plight got worse when at 6am, I had a freezing cold shower.  The water was about the same temperature as the time we went swimming in a river on the Isle of Arran in winter!  The reason i had to be up so early was that i had to catch a flight back to the capital Ulan Bator because, if we drove, I might not get back in time for my train to Beijing and then i would have to stay in Mongolia for at least another week before i could get another ticket!  Now, just for the record......I dont constitute this flight as cheating in my no flying policy as I am flying back to somewhere I havce already been, and in the opposite direction from Australia.  Therefore, I have come to the conclusion that i havent cheated.

We touched down in Ulan Bator after a short flight, and for the first time in over a week I managed to get mobile phone reception.  As soon as i turned my phone on, in came a text message from my mum with the best news I have had in weeks.....Man Utd beat Newcastle 2-0 and England beat Australia to go 2-1 up in the ashes series.  Que for me to dance around the airport like a madman with everyone staring at me as if i was going to eat their babies!!!!

When i had finally calmed down a bit, we collected our luggage and drove back into the city.  It was only then that I realised how polluted this city is.  As we drove around the ring road, you could see a huge cloud of smog floating just above the city.  This is mainly due to the fact that the city is surrounded by 4 power stations and it is jam packed with cars that spill out diesel fumes 24/7 geordie style.

I decided that i would take it easy for the two days i have left in Mongolia, update my journal, watch crap TV, drink and send all outstanding postcards, etc etc.

I checked into my hotel then went out to try and post back to the UK the two knives i bought in Karakorum.  What a pain in the ass that turned out to be.  I had wrapped them up carefully before i got there, only to be asked to unwrap them so that they could be checked for customs clearance.  They miserable woman cleared them and let me wrap them back up again infront of her.  Then i tried to post them, only to be told that i needed to go to another office to get a certificate to say they werent antiques or something like that.  Well, i was pissed off already and couldnt be bothered to hike to the other side of the city just for a piece of paper, so i just posted them anyway.  It cost me $19.  I felt like i had been anally raped by them, especially as they probably wont let them through customs anyway!

Now, my tour guide from the trip, Alta, insists on going everwhere with me in Ulan Bator even though i keep trying to shake of off one way or another but it just isnt working.  I think she might be after a bit of the Stumpy magic (or a European passport), but i have decided that i am definately not going there as she has got hairy armpits and i dread to think what shape the rest of her body hair is in!!! 

On my trip into the desert, I fully expected to gets the shits somewhere along the way, but as it turns out, Mongolian food had quite the opposite effect on my bodily functions.  As a dont have any laxatives with me, I have decided that the only course of action is to treat myself to a skinfull alongside a hot curry.

I found an Indian restaurant, and Alta insisted on accompying me, which is starting to get a bit annoying.  I opted for the Beef Vindaloo with Onion Naan.  It was weak, but it still tasted pretty good, so I left the restaurant a very happy man.  On the way back to the hotel, i decided to pick up a botle of wine and a few cans of beer to see to my bowel problems.  Then i proceeded to drink my way through them while watching a really crap film called Uptown Girls (I only watched it because Brittany Murphy was in it, im not a fag, honest).  I eventually passed out at a time unknown to me.

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