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Other entries in Queenstown

The Ferg

Oh yea

Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!! Wooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!! Hooooo!!!!!!!!

That’s the sound I have been making recently as our trip through the wonders of New Zealand brought us to the little place called Queenstown.

Now everyone and I mean everyone who I have met that has been to this little place raves about one thing and one thing only. Forget all the malarkey about throwing yourself of stuff the only reason to go to Queenstown is Fergburger. Now when I say everyone I met I mean everyone. So the first thing we did once we had set up was get ourselves into town for a Ferg. I ordered my “Mr Big Stuff” and Mia had a “Tropical Burger,” as we were waiting I was re running all the hype through my head and to be honest I was thinking that it might not live up to it, it might be all hot air. Then our number was called and I took and big bite of my burger and I’ll tell you…

So we had only a few days to kill, so after our Ferg we went to the tourist info and picked up a load of brochures to see what there is to see. Then it was a quiet stroll in town. There is a really nice lake and lots of mountains but no snow. Can you believe it!! We’re well into winter and nothing, no white stuff at all. So we wandered to the local cinema and took in Oceans 13, which is pretty good. Then it was a quiet night watching 12 Monkeys, and thinking about what we should do over the coming days.

Next morning it was up bright and early to see if there had been any snow fall…no. Then it was down to the info shop to book some of the activities. Then as we had time to kill we went on the hunt for gooey cake, which you would think would be pretty easy as everyone likes gooey cake. No no no, in New Zealand they have a thing about gooey cake, no one seems to eat it, what a bunch of loons. Eventually we found a place called Dux De Lux where I got a key lime pie, which was nice. Then it was up to our pick up spot for today’s activity. We where picked up by a Kiwi called Angus which is odd in a funny way as everyone you meet in Queenstown seems to be from elsewhere. So we went for a drive and picked up Mike (English) and Gurburz (Turkish), then it was off up Coronet Peak. At the top Mike and Gurburz went up the ski lift as Angus told us all the snow that was on the side of the mountain was man made and the ponds they use to do it are running out and they may have to stop using them as they will be needed for the winter festival at the end of the week.

Soon word came down from the boys and Angus, Mia and I jumped on the ski lift up to the top, it was bitterly cold. Then Gurburz came and spoke to me as I put on the harness I had been carrying. When it was on it felt like a giant nappy. Then it was over to the edge of the mountain, Gurburz clipped himself to me and Angus grabbed me and said run. I didn’t even have time to say good luck to Mia, I was running off the side of a mountain, I hit ice and started to slip, I thought it was going to be a sweet ride down the hill on my arse but my legs lifted off the ground as the wind caught the chute of the paraglide and Gurburz and I soared right up into the air at 5400 feet above sea level wooooo!!!!!!!! It was an awesome flight above the skiers, ski lifts, frozen ponds and the small towns below. It didn’t take long to get down but before me and the turk hit the ground he did some aerobatics, blimey the g force was so strong and we went spinning around and around and around, we dropped really suddenly too. We had to scare the sheep off the landing strip but a good laugh was had all round.

Then when we got back to the town we hit Minus 5 for a cocktail to celebrate our first activity and it tasted okish… I had pepper vodka in mine…okish. Then after tea it was back into town to the Pig’n’ Wistle where we were meeting Neil and Rosa (English), a couple we met in the Cook Islands. Lots of beer followed and late nights were had by all.

The next morning it was up early to catch a bus for our next adventure, it was really early and I had a slight hangover, I should have been in bed. So we were taken to the Kawarau Bridge where we were weighed and marked then we were sent off to meet our destiny. I wasn’t nervous about this at all until I stepped onto the bridge and saw the water below me, but soon enough I had an Englishman tying a big rubber band to my feet. Then I shimmied to the edge of the platform, I was 43 meters above the water thinking “what the f**k am I doing!!!,” the guy counted 3,2,1, I hesitated. He said “this time 3,2,1” and I was off into the great blue hurtling toward the earth before I felt the pull of the cord on my ankles. Wooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!! Hooooo!!!!!!!! My fists were in the air as I swung about twisting in the air. What a rush, it was mega. I would definitely do it again. Then I heard a voice shout “grab the pole,” I was spinning so much I couldn’t see where the voice had come from but then I saw a yellow dingy that was coming to get me, and soon I was on dry land watching Mia screaming all the way down. It was well cool.

Then it was back on the bus into town, on another bus and off to the Shotover canyon for some extreme jet boating. This thing is crazy! it goes 80kmph and we went 5 miles down this river in 5 minutes. The boat passes 800 litres of water every second, which means that the water is being forced out at about 280kmph. It can turn on a six pence and was spinning and just avoiding all the cliff faces by millimetres. The only bad thing was the fact that the water was freezing, there were icicles hanging off the trees and rocks and there were tiny bits of ice flying into our eyes. Stinging like a mo fo. We also learned of an Australian gold miner who spent $10,000.00 trying to divert a river down a tunnel so he could pick up all the gold off the bottom of the riverbed. Unfortunately he only got back $400.00 as while he was in the tunnel the river froze solid and all the other miners smashed up the river and took the gold. Soon the adventure was over and we were back in town with a couple of hours to kill.

We grabbed lunch and jumped on another bus and headed for our final activity of the day, as we were driving to the Canyon Swing Mia’s face looked like it could destroy a nation as she thought we were doing something else. Once we got to the swing we had to wait for so long I was getting cold feet and frustrated as it was freezing and I wanted a cup of tea. Then I was called over and strapped into harness and dangled 360 feet above the ground. There was a really good view and the guys were having a laugh and they pulled the cord on me when I wasn’t expecting it and I fly down backwards the only thing I could see was the cliff face going really quickly in the opposite direction.

Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!! Wooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!! Hooooo!!!!!!!!

The transition from fall to swing was great and I was soon laughing my head off as I was being lifted back to the platform, then it was Mia to take her turn and she went down screaming as usual, it was great fun and I should have done it again. So a cool rush and all the guys working there are all up for a laugh. One guy fell off attached to a chair. Sweet.

Then back into town and straight into the Pig for a night on the tiles with Neil, Rosa, Andy (Neil’s bro), Colin (English) and Zack (A BLOODY KIWI!!!), it was a great night full of laughs and merriness. We found out the Zack was a villager in Lord of the Rings but only his foot ends up on Screen in the normal addition that was in the cinema. He got paid $1400.00 to have his foot on screen…awesome. All this craziness was followed by a Fergburger.

The next day we were out really early again, I had the hangover from hell and my throat was on fire. We had decided to stay a few more days to catch the start of the winter festival as it was supposed to be really good. So we went down to our Fly-by Wire pick up and got picked up by a guy called Paul, who went to Elizabeth College in the year above me!!! So feeling rubbish we made our way to the site of our adventure. Now what the idea of this is, is that they have built a long go-kart and attached a bloody big propeller, this is attached to various wires, they winch you up into the air you release yourself and put the throttle full on as you fly around for 5 minutes with just the roar off the wind in your face and the roar of the engine behind you…crikey. Anyway this is a fantastic thing to do and I was reaching heights of 295 feet!!! Zoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooom!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I went. They have these signs to guide you if you have to turn later/earlier etc Paul also has one that says ‘Crappo’ for anyone from Jersey ha ha!! It was a great way to spend the morning but I highly recommend doing it without raging hangover and a sore throat.

Back in town we went back to an Irish pub we had found for a late Irish breakfast and as we sat by the fire drinking out hot tea/chocolate it started snowing…and didn’t stop. More snow fell in one hour here than it has done for the last ten years in Guernsey. So much in fact that they cancelled the winter festival, I know it sounds stupid but the Kiwi’s are as bad as the English when it comes to snow making the country come to a standstill. They actually need snow for most of the activities…but not too much. It then froze so none of the tourists could get into Queenstown, which meant we couldn’t get out so we ended up stuck there for a while but we made it out eventually.

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