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Otavalo, Ecuador
0° 13' N 78° 16' W
Jun 20, 2007 18:18
Distance 967km

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Driving in Colombia

Text written in: English

Alistair writes:

Don't get me wrong, the vast majority of the time riding in Colombia is like biker heaven; paved road with sweeping bends through stunning scenery.  It doesn't get much better than that, even on a heavily laden F650.  There are some aspects of riding in Colombia, though, that make riding through central London at rush hour seem positively serene - see below.

Colombian Rules of the Road
1. Size Matters
Despite what some people might try to have you believe, size does matter, especially on Colombian roads.  The bigger the vehicle, the less you have to care about other road users.  This places bikes pretty close to the bottom of the list, just slightly above cyclists and pedestrians.  I can't remember the number of times we have been forced onto the hard shoulder by trucks, buses and cars, either overtaking in the opposite direction (especially around blind corners - see Rule 2) or simply being bullied off the road in order to get into position to overtake the vehicle in front.  As a pedestrian you have to take your life in your hands every time you want to cross a busy road in town.  Drivers just look at you as if you are crazy if you expect them to stop AT THE STOP SIGN at pedestrian crossings.

2. Overtake at all Costs
It doesn't matter if you are stopping or turning off 5 metres down the road, you MUST overtake the vehicle in front - NO MATTER WHAT.  This is particularly fun at blind corners (i.e. all corners) or blind summits.  This is where Rule 1 comes into it's own.  Again, the number of times we've come around a blind corner to find 2 trucks thundering towards us can't be quantified. 

3. Thou Shalt Not Use Indicators
Indicators are an unused extra on most vehicles and definitely should not be used to inform other road users of any manoeuvre you intend to make.  If you are feeling generous, you ,might stick your arm out of the window to indicate that you are about to cross 3 lanes of traffic to take the exit 10 meters down the road, or put you hazard lights on when you've already pretty much stopped on the side of the road.  Buses and taxis are the worst offenders as there are no bus stops so they just stop when they see potential passengers, without indicating of course.  The same applies to pulling out after picking up said passengers, particularly when overtaking the bus that has stopped in front - see Rule 2 (there are millions of buses and taxis).

4. Use Any Lane You Want
Riding in big towns is a nightmare, made worse by the fact that we usually arrive in a big town tired after a hard day's riding.  There are usually dual carriageways in town and it's best to stick to the outside lane to avoid the constantly stopping buses and taxis - see Rule 3.  However this means that you are being constantly undertaken as everyone has to drive as fast as possible - see Rule 5.  If there isn't space to undertake (because of the stopping buses) then just invent a 3rd lane and go for it.  You also have to contend with the little motorbikes and bicycles who criss-cross the road taking no notice of direction of the traffic etc. Outside town, this takes the form of cutting corners, or simply just driving on the wrong side of the road, just for the hell of it, or to drive as fast as possible - see Rule 5.

5. Drive as Fast as Possible
It doesn't matter what the road conditions are like, you have to drive as fast as possible, in town or out - see Rules 2 and 4).
Trucks are very frustrating in Colombia as they can only seem to do about 15mph, regardless of whether they are going uphill or downhill and with the twisty roads you can get stuck behind them for miles.  I was going to do a diatribe on truck drivers but some have been nice to us, pulling over or indicating when it is safe to pass.  No, the total bastards on the roads are the bus drivers.  Stopping and pulling out without indicating (see Rule 3), bullying us off the road (See Rule 1 and 2) and going round blind corners on the wrong side of the road at top speed (see Rule 4 and 5).  The dedication of bus drivers to all the rules of the road was demonstrated yesterday when one of the bastards hit me coming round a corner on a tiny road at full speed pretty much taking up both lanes.  Fortunately it was just a glancing blow and I managed to stay on the road but my panniers now have a new "battling scar". 
Our Colombian friend in Bogota told us she had to take lessons and a test to drive like that.  It got me wondering what happens to the people who fail their tests.  When you think about it it is obvious really.  They become bus drivers!